Divorce Process: Does it matter who starts proceedings?

It is a known fact that it takes two to tango. Marriage is the outcome of the decision of two individuals. However, divorce can commence with the decision of one of the partners. 

Divorce is not as easy as it sounds because there are several things to consider aside from the physical and emotional stress that accompanies the whole process.

Also, admitting you need to divorce is a more difficult decision. Several people feel trapped in the net of hate-filled and abusive relationships as the divorce burden may be expensive- even if the decision to split is the perfect one.

Can I start the divorce process?

A recurring question many couples going through a divorce ask is whether it matters on who files the divorce.

Any party who is no longer satisfied with the marriage can start the divorce process. Most often than not, the spouse who files for the divorce (moving) faces a little consequence than the non- moving spouse.

In sharp contrast, the non-moving (the spouse who does not file for the divorce) may face a harsher consequence. The legal implications of who starts the process are limited.

When you weigh the bright and dark side, the one who starts the divorce process has the universe on its side. 

The person who starts the divorce process is often the one who determines the speed of the proceedings, which might not be convenient for the other partner, especially if the non-moving partner has other ideas.

Also, the non-moving partner is usually the one who pays the legal expenses that come with the divorce. However, this is limited to the process of bringing the marriage to a halt. It has no relation to financial matters or state of the partners.

It might sound bias, but this legislation of sort was enacted with the concept that if you can successfully prove your case, you will be rewarded and repaid the costs incurred. Unfortunately, it does not always apply in the family justice system of law.

However, some couples are kind enough to avoid having only the non-moving partner pay all legal fees. They do this by agreeing and reaching a consensus that they will share all the expenses incurred during the divorce process, either equally or based on proportions.

The above implies that the partner who files the divorce petition will not sign or seek an order for cost against the other. If you find yourself in this situation, it means that you are lucky.

Does it matter who starts the proceedings?

There are disadvantages attached to getting divorced. One of the drawbacks is that you have to go through the ordeal of having a legal description of your personality, which might not necessarily be true. Your private life and other privacy-related matters become open, most especially if your partner files the divorce the basis of unreasonable behaviour.

This is not good as it adds a lot of trauma and pain to an already painful and traumatic experience. What you can do is to file an answer to the allegations, compelling a compromise on the statements made against you.  

Nevertheless, it does not matter who divorces the other, when it relates to some important matter concerning the splitting. 

Being the one divorced does not constrain your right to your children, some of your properties, or in financial matters except if the petition has found your parenting skills incompetent and wack. 

The exception also includes how you have previously handled your finance or any issues related to money and how you treat your children. Therefore, ensure to properly check the petition filed by your spouse, most preferably do so with your attorney’s help so that you can know what is written against you.

When you know what was written in the petition, it will allow you to prepare mentally for any situation.

To avoid this problem and save yourself and your soon-to-be ex-spouse the animosity, offer the petition in draft first for your partner to check before sending it to the court. By so doing, you and your spouse can discuss everything stated in the petition and rule out things that may hurt you, cause adverse emotional trauma, and something that might dig out private matters you intend to keep as confidential.

This way, you can arrange on the matters that will arise in court, and you can both reduce the tenacity of the issues both of you have decided to tender before the court. This is the easiest and beautiful way to ensure that the whole process is relatively fair to both parties and make the atmosphere comfortable for the children.

Why it matters?

There are several reasons why the partner who files the divorce will have an advantage over the partner whom divorce is filed.

The divorce paperwork will only contain the allegations of the moving spouse as to the substantial grounds for the divorce. In most cases, it is not always accurate, and this will cause a proper articulation of the situation. However, it may influence the judge’s view and perception of the case.

Do I need to hire a solicitor? 

Not all couples love to involve the court though they are making tough divorce-related decisions. Instead, they resolve the matters on their own. However, when this is not achievable, the second-best solution is to contract a divorce solicitor to stand in your stead and help to negotiate with your spouse’s solicitor. 

Most often than not, contracting a solicitor to represent you in a divorce case is the best idea. This is so because a divorce lawyer who is highly experienced in family law will do everything to make sure the courts hear your version of the story without bias. Even if you and your partner decide to resolve your case, your solicitor will work to protect your rights. 

Final Thoughts

Are you presently thinking of filing a divorce or you are about to commence the process? It would be best to start the proceedings. To find out the necessary procedure, consult a divorce solicitor now to have the law on your side.